It Never Rains, But It Soars

Today i woke up with muscle pains all over, but pains that make you feel good you’ve got them. Why would pain be good? Well maybe because physical pain can often be a sign of accomplishment. The accomplishment i am talking about here is a simple cycling journey i did.

I woke up and thought to myself when i looked outside my window, that this day is looking grim and it is probably going to rain, so maybe i should just stay at home. Then for once, i told myself that when is it ever going to be a good time, and the truth is, hardly ever. So i got my things ready, took out my bicycle and gave it a good clean, tweak, greasing and re-pumping. The time was well into 3pm but i was determined. I got completely ready, music to my ears, and set off on my small journey. Journey of choice…Romford. A mere 8 miles away, or approximately 13 kilometres away if you like that sort of thing.


My journey began pretty well and sun was shining… well… pretty well. Then after a long journey i managed to reach my destination. The fun began when i decided to go back home, which was about 30 minutes after getting there. The rain began to pour down. But i expected it and nothing was going to ruin my ride. The music was complementing the rain pretty well and together it became harmony. After a minor injury and a stormy ride i eventually made it home drenched in salty water. And in the end it felt painfully great. I was determined to do this and i did it knowing it could never really be a right time for it. After all nothing we plan or wish for ever comes at the right time and in the end, we realise that the right time is when we make time.



Dream Capture

As the title implies things are beginning to get rather weird in regards to my dreams. It began a few weeks ago and now is becoming more frequent. I didn’t realise what was happening until a few days ago and thought i would blog about this because there may be more people out there like me or who have experienced this or something similar.

I’ve had a few tough times these past few days and things although difficult have been rather okay. But sometimes we hold these dark times inside. As we understand, these held darkness’s can build up and cause damage we don’t necessarily know is there. I found one of these for me that is in the form of dreams. Dreams sometimes take us places we’ve never been before; sometimes dark and scary places and other times fun and happy places. Never did i think that the good places in dreams could be a threat. I was inside a dream, a dream now which i don’t seem to remember, but at the time was vivid. But what happened was that when it was time to wake up, i couldn’t. I tried to wake myself up from the inside but the dream kept me back, almost as if it would sedate me in order to keep me in. The dream can eat up a good 4-5 hours of my day or sometimes even more.

Now as scary as it sounds, i analysed it for a few hours and realised that dreams are our subconscious and therefore they can react to how we live in the day. We can have a direct impact on what we dream, even though for most people dreams are uncontrollable or even passive. Sometimes life becomes difficult and life is the days we spend awake. When we sleep we can often be freed from the pains of daily life. What i realised was, what if the dream isn’t restraining me, what if i am restraining myself to be freed from the dream. If the dream world is the safe place, then what’s to tell the mind not to live there. As weird and wrong as it sounds, it wouldn’t be a surprise if there were people in this world who’d choose to live in the dream world where they can be the architects of their surroundings. It does however sound a lot like putting yourself into a coma. Of course i do not want to be stuck in my dream world as i understand that life is difficult and there’s no doubt about it, but we do have to fight, not just the world itself, but ourselves. We are always in a constant battle with our deepest darkest self. Now we just have to believe it is worth the fight.


The Anonymity of Dream Lucidity

I am of course talking about dreams. The term “Lucid Dream” is most normally defined as having a dream where the dreamer is aware that they are dreaming, thus also being able to manipulate and control aspects of the dream. I have been able to lucid dream for so long i can’t actually remember when it first began. All i remember is that i could control my dreams and after years i then realised what it was and researched a hell of a lot to find out all i could. This doesn’t happen to me every single day but out of a week, it’ll be at least three to four days. The main reason i believe I am writing this, is because of a few reasons. One of them is that so many people out there don’t even know they have this condition/ability. One may ask, why is it important that i should know? And from my experience and findings i have found out that it can be good and bad.

Initially i think of the movie Inception for their well developed modern movie based on lucid dreaming. If you haven’t watched it, it is definitely worth a watch or two (and i don’t mean sell your watch). when i dream, most of the time i am able to remember them, either because i just do, or i focus on remembering it as soon as i wake up (by repeating it in my head), or even by re-iterating (or memorizing) the dream while inside my dream so that by the time i wake up, I’ve already remembered it. Some of the good things i have managed to get from controlling my dreams are; so that i am able to win or succeed in the dream and then i wake up in better moods, or even become something really awesome inside it, like a super fighting world saving cybernetic being. For example, once i had a dream in which the city was being destroyed by a humungous monster, a bit like in the movie Cloverfield, and rather than running away, i realised that i was dreaming and stopped running. My friends were shouting, “What are doing? Run!” And i told them that this is a dream. One thing i have always noticed, is that your projections in the dream (the people inside the dream) never seem to either like or understand when you try to tell them that you’re in a dream and they can often become angered (after all your telling someone they don’t exist). But anyway to cut it short, i decided to concentrate and turn myself into a superhero, e.g. fly, super strength, super speed and so on…well just think of Superman… well without the underwear. Well without the underwear on the front, not without wearing underwear…yikes! And by becoming a superhero i defeated the monster. All i have to do in the dream is tell myself that this is a dream and that i can do anything. Then by willing myself to fly i am able to fly.

I noticed that if my dreams could be that immersive, vivid and sometimes even have a good storyline, then one thing i absolutely love about them is that most of my stories actually come from dreams. I have several novels in development and all were detailed dreams where i could vividly be apart of the story and control myself, and this in turn would make me wake up feeling like it was all real. All that detail makes an awesome novel and they aren’t just normal stories either, some of them i believe are quite unique. Sometimes however dreams can be so immersive and believable that you actually think it is real. One example of this would be this time i woke up and was late to meet my girlfriend. While still at home i fell to my knees saying, “Nooooo, i stood her up! How could i!” but then while on my knees i thought, “but wait, i would never leave my girlfriend hanging there like that. It’s not me. This must be a dream.” I then counted down “3…2…1…” and shouted “WAKE UP!” And i woke up realising i had several hours still left before meeting up with my girlfriend. Freaky or what? Oh yes and i can wake myself up whenever i want from within the dream as you have just read. Yikes, so much writing…hmmm…i know… here’s some pictures just to break the tension.

Super SquirrelLovey CatsFluffy The Destroyer


Now that we’re back from our break, i do however also suffer from heart palpitations whereby at times my heart rate will increase exponentially. The pounding can even drain my energy completely or hurt my chest. If i have a vivid lucid dream, then my mind is surely much more active while I’m sleeping. Therefore many times i have woken up after a chase sequence, or fight, or worse and because my mind is so immersed into the dream, when i wake up, my heart is already pounding like it is going to explode. It has even been said that lucid dreaming can cause children and even adults to wet the bed, not aware that they have done so because of the real-ness of a dream. So many children out there hide in embarrassment not knowing they do this due to having a lucid dream. One example would be going to the toilet in your dream, but because your mind is so immersed, it also happens in real life.

With all the movies i watch and games i play, i always have crazy detailed and normally action packed dreams, thus i am always exhausted when i wake up, which is especially not good when one has to go to work. Two days ago i had a dream that i became a Titan, yep a Greek God with great power…i know it sounds funny, but i am a weird human being so it works. I used my super strength as a Titan to free my family and friends from a hundred sealed metal gates imprisoning them for eternity. I used my hands to tear apart the metal bars like vines in a jungle. The only problem came, was when i woke up. My arms were in pain for the whole day especially around the biceps. It’s almost like having the power of the Gods (so to speak) is so much power for a mortal such as myself that when transforming back into the human (or in this case waking up), the body can’t handle the power and strength that was used and so you feel pain. This happens all the time to me, whether i land on my feat from falling from the skies or get punched in the gut by a robot, i wake up with the pains as if it had happened for real. I think this is where the mind takes it too far and thinks it was real and therefore makes the pain real. Or maybe it has something to do with the mind believing it to be real and so makes the body react as if it were real, e.g. muscles tensen continuously or rapidly resulting in muscle pain. You may not believe me, but i go through this every week; different dreams, different after shocks/pains. To bad my General Practitioner doesn’t seem to see this as a condition and therefore i have to live with it. I do however also see it as an ability of the mind. Maybe the mind’s psychic ability is enhanced. You might not believe me but I’ll write it anyway. From dreaming i also learnt how to drive a car when i was 17. My mind felt that the dream was so real that by the time i had woken up, i had learnt the techniques and was up and running on my first ever driving lesson. The instructor even asked me how many lessons i had done before, and when i told him that this was my first one he didn’t believe me. Of course at the time i felt i couldn’t just tell him i had learnt it in my sleep. But i guess now i have, to you and the world. The same thing happened with learning martial arts; dreamt it, and could do the moves when i woke up.

Talking of psychic, there have even been stories of people dreaming places and knowing it’s a dream and then waking up. Then after many years they have gone on a holiday and found that exact street and therefore know exactly where they are going. Weird, but then again so much in this world is unknown and we will always have a lot to learn. There is so much i could talk about here but maybe another time. I know for some this will be hard to grasp and others will be like “Oh my God, i lucid dream” or “Oh my God, I’m a weirdo” but trust me, weird is the best, for weird is unique. Is it all true? Is it all real? Do we believe it? I guess that’ll always be your opinion, but all i can say is…

The Truth Is Out There

Thanks for reading. Please do comment or even tell us if you’ve experienced anything similar, or even lucid dreaming itself.



A New Hope

First of all… Happy New Year!

I haven’t blogged in a while, so deepest apologies… well not too deep otherwise that’d be gross. But things have been a little rocky, well actually things have been so rocky, they’ve been Rocky V. We all have times when we just have too much unloaded on to us, for us to do the things we wish to. Sometimes they are things that are just inevitable and other times they are just down right bad. It makes me wonder if it’s life throwing to many things my way, or me not managing myself good enough. For me i thinks it’s more of a mix of the two with a little added extra of the former. But when it all comes down to it, we have this one day in every year that makes us think, “You know what? i don’t have to do or think like that anymore, because now it’s time for changes.” Some us actually do it and some of us just can’t. I am of course talking about the New Year. For many in other cultures, the day is different and for a large section of the world, it was last week, but the concept is the same.

Like many i too have used this time to create resolutions. Like for instance, one of mines is 1080p. Both the long term and instant resolutions are something we should feel loyal too, as for me, it is this that will make my life move forward. Thus a new year equals a new hope. A hope that’ll keep us going until the next year to come. And talking of new years to come, isn’t this an exciting year? By that i mean, this year we have that Mayan Prediction of the END OF THE WORLD. Do i believe it will happen… Nope, or at least i will go about my daily life like there isn’t. Do YOU believe it will happen? Post comments if you wish. I have done a fair deal of research on it and it is rather interesting. Although most “professionals” believe the Mayan side of it to be a mis-representation. The part that i would like to believe which excludes the supposed Mayan theory, is that this may be a time of new change. 2012 may indeed mark the beginning of a new era. Now that sounds better. Maybe the digital revolution will take over and the world will upgrade… hmm upgrades. Or SOME scientist in SOME remote location will have access to SOME super tech and will create a machine that will become artificially intelligent and then despise the idea that something as primitive as human beings have created it, and then it will build more of its own, and then create an army and unleash a war of mass proportions, while humanity is fending for their lives… ok i stop. Thanks for reading and stay tuned, or IPed. Haha that sounds funny.


Time Passes Like No Ones Business

So much time has passed and not a single post from me (sorry monkey). I guess i’ve been in one of those i don’t really know what to do yet i feel so busy kind of moments. With a scam, injured foot, 6 month long back pain, inner electric issues (for another time), a creative block and other general problems to deal with, it is definitely a great time of year. But it doesn’t mean let go and run or fall flat on your face and eat dirt (well…except mud pies…yummy!), it means that we are stronger than we know and can handle anything if we can get a grip on ourselves, a literal grip (excluding Darth Vader). It is tough we are all together in it. Where if one person feels lonely, another will somewhere across the world, and maybe another somewhere else. Therefore if we are alone…then we are alone together. Yes a paradox indeed! But then that means we are not alone. I wonder why X-Files came to mind there.

Anyway, yes for those that are reading my blogs, it’s early stages i know, so probably not many, i realized that to reach a wider range of people i have to do something i don’t really like…Facebook…Twitter. Two great mediums to access the worlds people. Would be much easier if it were one thing…like maybe…TwitFace…Yeah i like the sound of that; has a ring to it. But yes i was on Facebook for a very short time and didn’t really like it, but i guess i have a better reason to re-register. As for Twitter, i’ll see what it’s all about.

Facebook…a giant book of faces where anyone can read. Makes you wonder if the government have specialized Facebookers (or Facebookies as i like to say) that are paid to search through the vast population for information and the whereabouts of people. Good? Bad? Each has it’s equal and opposite i guess. One the one hand the Government and other organizations can track people who can caused some sort of terror in the world. However on the other hand our privacy is always in jeopardy. Of course i am sure that the creators of Facebook had a good enough reason without a bad thought as to its purpose. But then it is no so difficult. With TV’s having internet access, games consoles like the Nintendo 3DS and PSP Vita tracking your movement and for the PSP Vita even your virtual footprints. There isn’t really an escape. But i guess we can’t all hide in the shadows; we do indeed have lives to live. Maybe it be better we live our lives the way we wish to, yet keep these things in mind (Stay away from me Identity Theft!).

Well besides all that i will be on Facebook and Twitter and thus will have this blog linked to them. So by all means…Like…Tweet…and TWITFACE!


In Sickness and in Cake!

It’s been a week since my last post, well first post, well first and last post. Well anyway and a darn bug is going around infecting people with tummy sickness. Yep i’ve been infected too. It’s funny how when i’m ill i seem to think about about things more. Like life and what i’m doing and would like to do. Maybe it’s because you have time to lay there like a zombie, clutching your tummy and murmuring “urrghh” and “ooohhh” and “braaiiinnnnsss”. Good thing is that its not what i’ve been doing. No matter how it is i like to keep active.

Worse thing is, it’s my birthday tomorrow. I don’t like birthdays. We’ll i don’t like my birthdays, but i like celebrating other’s birthdays. Technically we are celebrating the day of our birth (long sigh) day anniversarized every year. To think we celebrate a time when we were once pure minded little tots. Then pushed into a world of corruption and control, we grow. But if there’s one thing i’ve learnt it’s that when a plant grows from a little seed, it’s got to go through dirt before it sees the light. That dirt i guess is the very difficulty we each face. Our dirt is unique to ourselves and only we can push through it. And i am not talking about a number 2. When your in schools, you have to learn to adjust into the world itself; like when i first realized that when a teacher said “Go wash your mouth out with soap!”, it didn’t mean i go to the classroom sink and shove a soap bar down my throat. Well just in my mouth really. That was me realizing that there are certain things that you just can and cannot do; it is how the world functions. From that day on i have always loved the taste of soap. Then comes secondary school where you actually try to fit into society. Friends, family, that sort of stuff. This is when our personalities really start to develop and so this is what i believe to be our critical point. What we learn here will define us. Then college where we develop ourselves into adults, learning about life and money and how from this point forward we are going to feed the economy in order to get our food back. Well, only a slice back. After this we decided on our life’s goals. Not all of them, but i think the ones we perceive as foreseeable or fathomable. I went through university as well as i thought it necessary to get that little piece of paper that defines to the government my skills and talents. Not accurate i would say. But nevertheless paying my lucky sum of £3000 fees i managed to suffice.

I will be 24 years old on the 24th of the ….  oops ran out of 24s. I like the sound of it. It’s funny how if we really think about it we are stupid (Don’t worry i’m not insulting you, maybe just me). Just asking yourself, “Are you cleverer than you were last year?”. Yep i am. Then that means last year i was stupider than this year. But that also means now i’m stupider than next year, darn i’m stupid haha. But that also means that i’m also cleverer than i was last year. So if we really think about it,  we are stupid and clever. Haha made you think i was calling you stupid. I guess what is really cool to celebrate is that year after year we’ve learnt so much more to the very knowledgeable minded people we are today; and we all have knowledge; yep even you little monkey. Wait, why is there a monkey reading my blog. Oh and the cake.


P.S. Subscribe or comment and i’ll send you cake via email. Ok maybe in 50 years time when we can defragment the molecular structure of any given substance and email it to any recipient, who therefor can rebuild it and enjoy it for its very tasty creamy cakiness.