Void of Prospect

I stare into the void in my poor beggar’s life. I blink once twice and the third shoots me in the head with light. As i look up a mechanical being walks past hissing and clanking engraving the ground as it strides. I forget the world I live in and then remember it all at once. A world where donations only go to the rich and wider pavements for the poor.

The light hits me in the thoughts once again. From this point onwards I have no void. I have purpose. I, now upright am ready for my test. I observe the two enforcers on my left as they compute their surroundings in their cold minds. Eyes dead as dust. I look ahead at the upper city and my path is set. I run. The wind has become me as I rocket myself past everyone. I hear the bleeps of the enforcers but carry on, because now I can make a difference. Now I can change things.

 

Morning Cough Up

I thought I’d put this one in there as it may be small and simple but unusual nevertheless.

I was in my room and on my computer, doing the usual research for job applications and so on. I poured a glass of water and set it on my desk. As i typed away to exhaustion i reached for the drink and missed, knocking it over. Those who know my computer setup (hardly anyone) will know of the junction upon junction of cables, plugged into a multitude of sockets and extensions all leading to one main outlet. The water spilt on the table and immediately ran its way down behind the table and onto the wires and plug sockets. Sparks flew like mini fireworks upon my feet. I jumped down to power everything off but by then a fire had started and was quickly spreading. I tried to put out the fire but it spread to my whole room and i was choking somehow trapped in my room without a way out. The smoke became unbearable and i began choking heavily. And then i made myself wake up.

I woke up coughing and choking. I immediately took control and calmed myself down but the taste of the dark threatening smoke lingered for much of the day. Bizarro. Bizarro indeed.

 

Us Transhumanised

A woman was working in a missile development organisation. What type of missiles? I don’t know to be honest. She soon realised that there was something wrong in the organisation, something bad was going on. She decided that she had no choice but to tell the only person she knew, a detective. The woman and the detective had some history together, but i am not aware of what it is. The company somehow found out about this woman’s behaviour and decided to kill her to stop her from telling anyone.

Not aware of how she did it, she managed to infiltrate the organisation factory and smuggled out the missile. She took the missile to a remote location and sold it to an anonymous individual. The detective on the other hand managed to find the woman on an investigation one night. He asked her where she took the missile too, but the woman had no choice but to not trust him, even if he was genuine. The detective took the woman somewhere safe where the organisation’s hired gunmen were not able to find her.

Meanwhile i had just woken up from the hospital, with a blinding amnesia. There was pain in my hand. As i rose my left hand unaware, i noticed two incisions running across it. I poked at it for a while and noticed that although there was blood, there was no pain. Fear began seeping into my body as a chill ran down, but with a quick shrug, i released the fear and poked into the wound. I gently peeled away the skin, the two incisions on either side. My hand was not all it seemed. There were metal poles in replacement for my bones. Two miniature hydraulic looking poles per bone, per finger. I closed away the skin and saw it beginning to heal right away, slowly but visibly. I got up and walk outside.

I had been walking for some time now trying to get reality back into my mind as if everything was the dull boring world i imagined it to be. As i walked out of a shop i bumped into someone. Someone i knew. A girl. I sensed an overwhelming feeling of attraction. I knew her. I called her name and she responded with an awkward “Oh hello”. We had history. After a small catch up session, i pulled out my hand to show her. She showed care when she saw the blood and then an expression of understanding when she saw the machinery inside it.

“You injured your hand beyond repair, how?” She questioned.

“I don’t remember, a lot of my memory is gone. So you’re saying that i injured my hand so bad that they have replaced most of the insides with machine parts?” It seemed i was waiting to be wrong.

“Yes, that’s correct. I had a similar procedure on my foot, now it is metal too.” She said with a gentle smile of irony.

I asked why she hadn’t told me about her injury and it seemed the history between us had sparked a very small amount of conversation on every encounter. The irony of the situation made me smile. A cybernetic left hand and her cybernetic right foot. The metal inside had strengthened my hand tenfold and it seemed to had done the same to her foot. We walked together down the rustic decaying street and under a bridge that looked like it could crumble at any point. Past the bridge was a beach. The Sun golden brown, setting a bronze tinge to the dying city. We spoke about a situation that occurred in the past between us, and with our new transhumanised minds, it seemed we had more in common than ever. I looked at her, face glowing in the Sun. I place one hand behind her gently clutching her tattered grey jumper and another behind her neck. I brought her close and kissed her. I felt human again, i felt real, i felt love. And then memories flooded in. I saw a woman running away from people and a great weapon. It all seemed too surreal but it had to be real. I explained it to my love and she seemed to understand it.

“I know where we must go. Come with me.”

I grabbed her hand and she got got up with me and we began our journey together to find this woman and stop this weapon from ever being used.

 

And then i woke up for real.

 

The Worst Nightmare Of My Life…So Far

I was sitting on a stool just minding my own business when a tingly sensation infiltrated through my body. I thought nothing of it and carried on with what i was doing. All of a sudden, with no other warning, my body froze and i feel from the stool to the ground face down. I couldn’t move. Everyone ran up to me and asked if i was ok and i replied,

“Don’t worry, it’s ok, i’m just in sleep paralysis.”

No one had a clue what i was talking about as this usually happens when i tell people something that breaks the boundaries of their world. I thought this was it but it got worse. My vision became blurry to the point where all was in soft focus and then even that became even worse to the point where all i could see was a blur of colours. I was blind. This couldn’t be real but nevertheless i began to panic a little. It couldn’t get any worse right? I was wrong. I began shouting to everyone for help. I was actually scared for once. As i shouted a burst of two extremely loud sound frequencies perforated my ear drums. One was a really low frequency and the other a really high frequency; together forming a bleeding melody from hell. The sound was never-ending and i found myself deaf. My ultimate fear of ultimate paralysis, where i cannot move, see or hear. I knew i could still shout but it didn’t matter anymore, all was lost.

I had to wake myself up. I knew i was dreaming, but why was i stuck? Was it the fear? I shouted at the top of my lungs once more and like an exit from a coma i awoke in the real world still screaming. It took a second before i realised my scream from the dream had continued into reality and so i stopped before anyone in the house had heard. My head pulsated in pain and my heart was pounding harder than ever but my body was still in sleep paralysis. My body lay dead and my arms crossed over my chest. I calmed down as my body melted from the sleep paralysis and after a few minutes i got up to drink some water.

I don’t get nightmares often. To be honest i am pretty sure this is my life’s third nightmare. This was by far the worst nightmare i have ever had. And the worst part was that this is the first time a nightmare has seeped so far into reality after waking up. Usually i am able to wake myself up from within the dream world earlier, or even embrace death in the dream, because death always wakes me up, even though i am left with the cause of death as a waking pain for the whole day; a downside to lucid dreaming. But this wasn’t death, this was torture and torture is always the worst.

 

Dream Capture

As the title implies things are beginning to get rather weird in regards to my dreams. It began a few weeks ago and now is becoming more frequent. I didn’t realise what was happening until a few days ago and thought i would blog about this because there may be more people out there like me or who have experienced this or something similar.

I’ve had a few tough times these past few days and things although difficult have been rather okay. But sometimes we hold these dark times inside. As we understand, these held darkness’s can build up and cause damage we don’t necessarily know is there. I found one of these for me that is in the form of dreams. Dreams sometimes take us places we’ve never been before; sometimes dark and scary places and other times fun and happy places. Never did i think that the good places in dreams could be a threat. I was inside a dream, a dream now which i don’t seem to remember, but at the time was vivid. But what happened was that when it was time to wake up, i couldn’t. I tried to wake myself up from the inside but the dream kept me back, almost as if it would sedate me in order to keep me in. The dream can eat up a good 4-5 hours of my day or sometimes even more.

Now as scary as it sounds, i analysed it for a few hours and realised that dreams are our subconscious and therefore they can react to how we live in the day. We can have a direct impact on what we dream, even though for most people dreams are uncontrollable or even passive. Sometimes life becomes difficult and life is the days we spend awake. When we sleep we can often be freed from the pains of daily life. What i realised was, what if the dream isn’t restraining me, what if i am restraining myself to be freed from the dream. If the dream world is the safe place, then what’s to tell the mind not to live there. As weird and wrong as it sounds, it wouldn’t be a surprise if there were people in this world who’d choose to live in the dream world where they can be the architects of their surroundings. It does however sound a lot like putting yourself into a coma. Of course i do not want to be stuck in my dream world as i understand that life is difficult and there’s no doubt about it, but we do have to fight, not just the world itself, but ourselves. We are always in a constant battle with our deepest darkest self. Now we just have to believe it is worth the fight.

 

Mind, Body and … Well, Just Those Two

Something extraordinary happened. I have had lucid dreams for a very long time and usually the lucidity keeps to itself, as in the dream remains in the dream and reality remains where it is. I have spoken before about how lucidity has had affects on my body whether it is tiredness and exhaustion from a very active dream or emotions seeped into reality by dream content. This time i managed to do something else, something much more advanced. Using a visual pattern within my dream i was able to associate each shape within the iterative pattern with certain body parts. For example i would find a small hexagonal shape within the pattern and associate it with my left arm, and another shape with my right arm, and maybe a different shape entirely for my leg, or even my waist.

I managed to use the formula in my dream and move my arm and then when my arm dropped i semi woke up and noticed exactly that. I then fell back to sleep and elevated my leg and then woke up as it dropped. The final movement i managed to make, was turning my body to my right. When i woke up for that i knew this wasn’t just a coincidence, plus remembering my dream only strengthened the thought of what was happening.

There are so many things in life we don’t yet know and i would love to delve deeper into this and work out how i managed to sleep move with control. Who knows maybe I’ll work it out or maybe it was just a lucky once time only, even though it was the second time.

Thank you for reading and hopefully i haven’t freaked you out.

 

A Dreamy Ray of Pain

I woke up today and felt a little unusual. Ignoring the feeling i went out to see this new building that was supposedly doing great things for people. The building was built to help support, train and develop children to grown people. I approached the building with its glass structure. The doors were large and heavy but slid open smoothly. I decided to go through all the floors looking at the individual sections for different people. One floor trained children mathematics while others taught the power of reason. It was an interesting place. There was even a place to play indoor crazy golf.

I decided it was time for me to leave and head home. I was walking down the stairs and somehow my foot slipped and i fell down the flight of stairs. Hard marble-like steps jabbing at my bones as my body fell. Although endless in mind, i came to a halt at the very bottom. I couldn’t move. I was so scared. I reached out to feel my back and my spine felt different. It was crooked. Was i paralysed? No i wasn’t. I didn’t realise how this was possible but i began to get up. All of a sudden heat began to surge throughout my body, raising my temperature to what felt like boiling point. My eyes became red with fire and before i could think about what was going on, a burst of red hot light rocketed out of my eyes, hitting the concrete wall in front of me. The collision made a crackling boom. I couldn’t control it, the heat was in control now, my eyes continued to fire this ray of heat at uncontrollable lengths. I shouted for help; for people to drag me outside where it was safer. A group of people, maybe three, ran to me and dragged me towards the door. No one was around to open the door so i directed my gaze at the door and the continuous blast of heat seared the glass doors to a point at which they cracked and exploded. Shattered glass lay dangerously splintered across the floor. “Thank you! Leave me!” i shouted in exhaustion. I raced outside barely standing and looked up at the sky to direct my heat ray up so that no one would get hurt. While facing up i began to focus, hone my curse and try to stop it. The ray flickered for a bit and then again. I need to try harder. It flickered again and then came to a halt. The screeching hiss was now silent as i was being watched by everyone outside. I had controlled it…for now.

 

And then i woke up for real.